tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5936965799962341722024-02-19T23:56:12.679-08:00Australian and World Politics 2013 and into the present...The Art of Saying Little, with ConvictionUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-70593533672000229442020-05-04T05:51:00.000-07:002020-05-04T05:51:14.293-07:00Contemplating Orange Crush<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>Hello Mr President.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Hi have we met before?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>Oh yes, you liked my pussy…</b>.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Really? Was it orange like me?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>I was in the Secret Service and you called me Agent Orange!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Wow, you must have had a killer pussy!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>It sure blew your mind… <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>….. So I hope you can remember something useful and answer my questions….<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Don’t get aggressive now….<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>So tell me, do you believe China has Weapons Of Mass Destruction?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Oh yes, I do….<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>And you have hard evidence?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Yes, our intelligence people have reliable evidence!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>So what are you going to do?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>I have told the Chinese that we want our inspectors to access their labs.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>And if they refuse?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>We will punish them! I think we might invade…. Show them how great we are!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>Really? Do you remember when Bush said Iraq was making viruses in their Labs?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Iraq, Iraq…. Is that a place?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>Do you remember when we said if the communists took over Vietnam, all the SE Asian dominoes would fall?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>That was long before my time… What happened?<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>We unleashed Agent Orange!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
You really f**ked them over then….<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<b>Totally, yes and we are still paying for it!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<i>Hmm, I’m the richest man in the world! What are you doing after work?</i></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-24021687392427528562020-05-02T06:25:00.000-07:002020-05-02T06:25:46.042-07:00Dealing With Covid 19 And Climate Change In Australia<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Hello Minister…. Are you staying well?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Oh yes indeed. I have been maintaining social distancing!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>And it has worked for you?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Oh and for the nation!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>We seem to be doing well… So how long do you expect this
to continue?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>It depends on the science! We follow the advice of the scientific
experts! That is the way we will avoid a total catastrophe.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>So, it’s all about the science?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Yes, we accept the modelling and we formulate policy
based on the scientific advice. And we wait for the scientists to find a
vaccine or a cure…<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>And following the science is more important than
following big business?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Yes in the short term, but in the longer term business
will thank us! Everybody will thank us!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>So will you change your policies to avert the
catastrophic disaster that scientific modelling of climate change predicts? I
mean, the vast majority of reputable climate scientists are predicting a cataclysm if we don’t do something soon!<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Not everyone accepts that view! In the mean time we need
an enquiry into the origins of the Covid 19 crisis!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>But wasn’t it largely because politicians ignored the
warnings of medical and scientific experts, both in China and then the rest of the
world and did not take the appropriate actions quickly enough?<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Australia has been quick to react and we have done well…..
We have followed expert advice…<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Yes, so shouldn’t we do more about climate change when it
could destroy humanity and the planet as we know it? <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Let us pray not!<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<b>Huh?</b>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-16840147252239831282017-10-12T14:34:00.000-07:002017-10-12T14:36:17.586-07:00A Patient Prime Minister In WaitingIt has been a while, Prime Minister In Waiting....<br />
<br />
"Well I'm a very patient man."<br />
<br />
What have you been doing all this time?<br />
<br />
"Walking the righteous path, meeting with elders, taking council, talking to my flock."<br />
<br />
Are you not anxious for change?<br />
<br />
"You should know that at heart, I am a very conservative person, so rapid change is not my thing."<br />
<br />
You're happy just to wait for your second coming and not help things along?<br />
<br />
"I don't need to, but if my supporters conduct a little sabotage.... burn a few bridges, light a fuse or two, sink a few boats.... "<br />
<br />
That sounds like ISIS!<br />
<br />
"Oh, I mean it metaphorically!" "I believe in our democratic system!"<br />
<br />
Still, sounds a like a storm on the horizon to me...<br />
<br />
"Well every rainbow needs a little rain!"<br />
<br />
Ah, you have a rainbow connection too?<br />
<br />
"Back off sister!"<br />
<br />
OK, OK.... I don't want a shirt front in my solar plexus!<br />
<br />
"Sorry, I apologise." "I would never do that to a woman!"<br />
<br />
Ah of course... You were just letting off steam?<br />
<br />
"I won't bust my boiler, when I just have to keep the coal fires smouldering."<br />
<br />
I suppose...so it could be long wait?<br />
<br />
"Don't worry, I'm confident the sun won't burn a hole in my hat before I'm boss again!"<br />
<br />
So there's a climate for change in this country?<br />
<br />
"Oh believe me sister, there is a train a coming and a change is gonna come Oh Lord!"<br />
<br />
Ah well, I hope you are not standing in the middle of the tracks, Prime Minister In Waiting!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-18654476879503191102016-07-04T06:41:00.001-07:002016-07-04T06:41:59.869-07:00Now that the torture is in its new phase...Hello again Prime Minister in waiting...<br />
<br />
<b>Please don't call me that!</b><br />
<br />
Well, you are looking in a better position than before the election.... and you were pretty much on the money with your predictions!<br />
<br />
<b>I know... but in all modesty, I won't say "I told you so!"</b><br />
<br />
No?<br />
<br />
<b>Oh all right, Na na n na-na, I told you so! I told you so! I told you so! </b><br />
<br />
Now you sound like the school yard bully....<br />
<br />
<b>Uh? I just had to enjoy being right about something for once...</b><br />
<br />
For once, Prime Minister in Waiting,<br />
<br />
<b>F off numbskull!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>No, you don't sound like a future Prime Minister....<br />
<br />
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-42981758639914084742016-06-28T05:45:00.000-07:002016-06-28T05:45:57.984-07:00Now that the torture is coming to a...new phaseHello Prime Minister!<br />
<br />
<b>Oh you know I am no-longer the Prime Minister!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
But you were!<br />
<br />
<b>Yes, but this is not America. We don't keep our title, like their Presidents...</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
True... but you are the Prime Minister in waiting.....<br />
<br />
<b>Well I won't have to wait long before these blowsy boys bury themselves after this election!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
You hope so?<br />
<br />
<b>I just listen to their endless repetitive boring piffle with cotton-wool in their mouths and I know they won't last... I mean, their woolly waffle belongs in the social pages...</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
You mean Socialist pages?<br />
<br />
<b>No sport, the social pages! When I'm Prime Minister politics will be back on the sporting pages, where it belongs. Fighting the good fight. Killing em with our decisive manoeuvring. Making them beg for mercy. They won't know what hit 'em!</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
I guess not, Prime Minister.....Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-55403593192951587212015-09-14T05:33:00.003-07:002015-09-14T05:33:59.275-07:00The Prime Minister Has Left The Building!<div class="MsoNormal">
Prime Minister, Prime Minister where are you?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Who are you looking for?</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tony!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Oh, Tony has left the building!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Left his bunker? Does that mean the war is over? He was our
war time Prime Minister!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Oh no! Only the battle!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But his army has been routed! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Oh but that does not mean the war is over. The guerrilla war
has just begun!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
.... But this isn’t Iraq or Afghanistan or Syria!!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>And Tony won’t hide in a fox hole in the desert!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
God knows where this will end.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b>Ah, God is Great!</b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Huh?</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-7290916506977381182015-03-09T19:22:00.000-07:002015-03-09T19:22:57.579-07:00Don't Worry About The Future<div class="MsoNormal">
Hello Prime Minister, How’s it going?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Great. We are in a new phase of good governance!<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So, I thought the economy was heading for car crash!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Ah, that’s why we are reinstating support for the car industry…<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And reversing other budget cuts? What about Labour’s budgetary
black holes?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>We want people to be happy!<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Will they be happy when they fall into a black hole? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Now don’t you worry about that! That’s far off in the future, laddy!<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Sort of like Climate Change?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i><br /></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><i>Yes!<o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I see, Prime Minister.<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-22834825916413700302015-02-05T15:44:00.001-08:002015-02-05T15:46:37.356-08:00Prime Minister Fears Executions<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #53553a; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 9pt;">All
appeals have failed</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">The
executions are inevitable…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">Now…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">There's
a bicycle comin'<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">And
I'm gonna ride it<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">I'll
rise in the morning<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">My
fate decided it<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">I'm a
dead man cyclin'<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;">
<span style="color: #53553a; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt;">I'm a
dead man cyclin'<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--></span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;">Already
broken, already gone<br />
Already know you're moving on<br />
I'm a breathing, talking<br />
Dead man, cycling<br />
Already see it, in your face<br />
Already someone, in my place<br />
I'm a breathing, talking<br />
Dead man, cycling<br />
<br />
I hear the media talking talking talking<br />
Now I'm a dead man cycling cycling cycling<br />
I hear the media talking talking talking<br />
Now I'm a dead man. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">In the future, the
execution will not be televised.<br />
In the future, the execution will not be televised.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">In the future, the
execution will not be televised?</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;">(with apologies to Springsteen, The Script and G Scott-Heron)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-33685707241414800392015-01-27T20:37:00.000-08:002015-01-27T20:38:29.188-08:00The Knight Prince<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Happy New Year Prime Minister!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Hello!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>The war must be going very well!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Well, yes… it is….<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>I hear you have a new knight to champion your cause!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Er…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>Yes, Sir Prince!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Oh, but knighthoods are not political appointments!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>And neither are the Royals!</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> No!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>So what is the point of them?</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Well, they show others what we stand for! And they make us
feel good too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><i>You must be feeling really good then, Prime Minister???</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;"> Hmmm.</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-69009075288405430782014-10-15T23:43:00.000-07:002014-10-15T23:43:55.690-07:00A Small Matter of Priorities<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Prime Minister, some people are worried about the Government’s
priorities…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The Government’s first
priority is looking after our national interest.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Does that stop at our borders?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Well Mike, the
Government will assess each issue on its merits.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Ah.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We will not waste
money on frivolous and unnecessary projects!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You want maximum bang for buck, like bombing Iraq?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Our economy is vulnerable
and we must focus on the most important issues!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Not Ebola, Malaria, pollution, climate change, species
extinction?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We will not put our
citizens at risk by committing them to deal with these problems….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So who will?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We are just a small
country, with a fragile economy that mainly relies on selling natural resources
to China and we can do very little….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So just a couple of bombs?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Yeah….</span></b>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-27616376833669113262014-10-13T19:33:00.000-07:002014-10-13T19:36:02.006-07:00Putative Problem<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Hello Prime Minister,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Hi Sport!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I understand we are having another review of our training
system. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Yes, we need to get
back basics… <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Back to basics?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Yes, our education
system is in disarray.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So, not teaching the three Rs is the putative reason our education
system has crashed?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Pardon? Putin has
nothing to do with it!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Prime Minister, How do you spell “Diplomacy”?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">S...h…i... <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Umm. I said<b> </b>“Diplomacy”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Listen Sport, I’m the
captain of this team and if I decide to spell a word my way, then that’s how we
spell it! Right!? Now out of my way …<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Yes Prime Minister!</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-66767551821835939572014-10-07T20:23:00.001-07:002014-10-07T21:13:48.171-07:00More about drones...<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Hello again Minister!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Hello Mike, Pleased to
be with you!</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I’d like to ask you about some operational matters….<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>The government does
not discuss operational matters….</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But you have announced that our Ipod controlled drones have
been flying over Iraq…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b><i>Yes</i>.</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And they did nothing?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>The government does
not discuss operational matters….</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">There was an announcement that they could not distinguish the
goodies from the baddies, so they returned to base.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Hmm, but the government
does not discuss operational matters….</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Do you think this was a face recognition software glitch or
something else??<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>Are you saying we only judge the enemy by their appearance?</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">No, I am asking for facts!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>We have discussed this
problem with Apple and they are preparing a special software upgrade for us
called 10.0 …</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Isn’t that Microsoft’s new operating system?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>The Australian government
demanded we only have latest and greatest, so Apple said they would give us 10.0 …</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So this should solve the problem?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><b>The government does
not discuss operational matters….but we hope so…</b><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Really?</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-8266793803461066052014-09-18T23:35:00.000-07:002014-09-18T23:35:24.132-07:00Team Australia Declares War<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fellow Team Australia Members,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I am speaking to you in troubling circumstances from my tree
bunker in faraway Arnhem Land. I am soberly
and reluctantly announcing that your government has declared war on Ibis. We
have, I believe shown incredible restraint and do not go into this endeavour
at all lightly. We are aware of the potential social and economic costs.
However Ibis have gotten out of control. Their numbers have grown to the point
where they are disrupting everyday life. We have seen Ibis walking in the main
streets of our towns, putting the welfare of motorists and pedestrians at risk.
Picnickers have nearly lost their heads to marauding birds. Enough is enough. We can no longer tolerate
this aberrant behaviour.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To this end, your government has purchased a fleet of the
latest vertical take-off drones, equipped with the latest bird repellent
noise-makers and scatter shot-guns. They will be controlled using the latest
Apple iPhone 6 loaded with a top secret version of IOS 8.1 … developed by Apple
U.S. under the guidance of our Air force, made in China and assembled somewhere
in Australia …. We believe this approach
to be effective and affordable with minimal risk to the lives of Australians
and will remove the threat that Ibis bring to the Australian way of life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ibis should be regarded as dangerous and no citizen should
approach or attempt to engage with an Ibis. If you as a member of Team
Australia, notice flocks of Ibis congregating in your neighbourhood, it is your
patriotic duty to ”tweet” to the nation
so that our drones can take prompt and effective action to keep our nation
safe. The nation that “tweets” together flies!
Ibis will fall!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Further updates will be transmitted from this bunker in coming
days. I look forward to our glorious
victory.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Your beloved Team Leader.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-66656123648507598892014-06-03T22:08:00.003-07:002014-06-09T22:53:49.144-07:00Answering Budget Questions...<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So Prime Minister, how are you coping with
the public anger over your budget?<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Government is doing what is best for
Australia and Australians.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you feel people are justified in
believing you have miss-led them?<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Australians will learn that we have done
the responsible thing for the country.<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Will you change your budget in response to
public criticism?<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The government has developed this budget
after detailed analysis and due consideration...<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you ever answer a question directly?<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Australian people will have the
opportunity to judge us at the next election....<o:p></o:p></span></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you remember Kevin Rudd?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-GB"><b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, why?</span></b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-19698824105359941032014-05-14T22:16:00.003-07:002014-05-14T22:16:45.114-07:00Our ABC, QI<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Prime Minister?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I heard you are writing a guide book to the new ABC?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is not called the ABC
guide book!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s called QI, ABC.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I repeat QI<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh, I see, nothing else?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No.</span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-66771893066428575402014-05-14T20:29:00.001-07:002014-05-14T20:29:52.143-07:00The War Continues<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hello Prime Minister!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hello!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How is our war-time Prime Minister going?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Excellent!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Does it feel good to
be at war with everybody?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Good for me and good
for the country!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Truly?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, my father always
said that young people have become too soft. They really need another war to
toughen them and teach them what life is all about!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But innocent people suffer and die in wars!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For the greater good!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And nobody truly wins, except big business…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And this is good for the country….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Are you sure, Prime Minister?</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-72833758514698688252014-05-07T22:54:00.001-07:002014-05-07T22:55:49.624-07:00The Aging Population Problem<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So Prime Minister, our aging population is a major problem
for your budgeting?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Don’t you worry about
that now…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But I’m an aging baby boomer. I am concerned for my future!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No worries. We have
had an enquiry and have a solution.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A solution?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, it’s called the
Pacific Solution.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But that’s for Boat People!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And it worked for
them! Baby boomers like to travel and we think they will like to spend their retirement
years in Asia. They will be much cheaper to support there…. I mean living expenses
and medical costs will be far less. The Asians will barely notice a few
Australian retirees. I mean our numbers are barely significant compared with
their populations. And think of the contribution the wealthy retirees will make
to the local economies! There will be no argument.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And if they don’t want to go?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Ah well, we have
places we don’t use any more, where we can put them…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You have?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, you know.
Inverbrackie, Villawood, Port Augusta, Port Hedland….. and many others!</span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-69697551447592784302014-04-29T23:53:00.000-07:002014-05-01T21:57:28.763-07:00Black Holes revisited<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Prime Minister, do you remember when in August last year I talked to you about Budgeting and Black Holes?</span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Black Holes??</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes...</span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Black Holes? No...</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Surely you remember! You said your budgeting contained no Black Holes...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Black.... Black Holes..... Can't say I do..... Totally blacked out on that one...</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hmm, away with the stars...</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-21579328583769468132014-04-29T23:31:00.001-07:002014-04-29T23:31:35.309-07:00Crisis!<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Did you know we are
at war?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We are?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yes, no doubt about
it! At war with DEBT, at war with DRUGS, at war with BOAT PEOPLE, at war with INTERNET
CRIMINALS, at war with LIBERAL EDUCATIONISTS, at war with BIKIES and at war
with UNIONS…. At war with our OPPONENTS.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So that’s why we need strike fighters, war time taxation and
austerity measures?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Absolutely….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So you are a war-time prime minister!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The one Australia
needs!<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And you will bring peace?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hell no! I would lose
my job…</span><o:p></o:p></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-16428861053346903672014-04-29T18:59:00.002-07:002014-04-29T18:59:37.257-07:00The Economy continued....<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So Prime Minister, you promised not to increase taxes or
introduce new ones….<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Have you forgotten
about core promises and non-core promises?<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think you said they were a thing of the past!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Some things are set
in stone.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Like core promises?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No, I mean “core
promises and non-core promises”…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So this is politics. Does that mean it is OK to lie?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No I think people
wouldn’t like that… but you can’t always
tell people what is good for them…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So you lie to them?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No, but it is OK to
scare people shitless…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What do you mean by that? Is that policy?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m not sure… I just
thought of it…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To be continued…</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-27132500616347561092014-02-03T21:29:00.000-08:002014-05-12T20:50:43.253-07:00Deja Vu<div class="MsoNormal">
So how does it feel to be Prime Minister after five months
in power?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Great! It’s like riding a bike!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
How so?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You get on it, put your head down and your bum up and you
pedal like mad!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So how do you know where you’re going?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ah, you look in the rear-view mirror!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You do?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes and you see all the great Party leaders and their past
policies guiding you…<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Into the future?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes it is a brave new world!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Just like the old one?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes!<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
Ah, so now I understand….<o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-60505630122387631642013-09-08T19:28:00.000-07:002013-09-08T19:41:23.181-07:00Hiatus<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Notice: Further entries in this Blog will be delayed until a new contract has been negotiated between myself and my service provider. I am uncertain if I will have the moral or optical fibre to to sustain an acceptable level of through-put. Only time will shed the necessary light to reveal the truth of this matter...</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-41266486854467708852013-09-05T18:01:00.001-07:002013-09-05T20:17:39.428-07:00Black-Out Day (or Changing Religions)<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I never really knew him as well as I needed to…</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He walked among us but he was different.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He was a man who only said what was necessary.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So many questions with so few answers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Then the black day arrived, when he was banished from our media
life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Would I live to regret not knowing him better, when the day
of judgement arrived?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But then I was overcome with righteous joy!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On the third day he would be resurrected in a different
incarnation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He would be the way, the truth and the light would shine
brightly on all his words and deeds… <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And we would all know who he really was…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And we will hold hands as one and he will preach peace and unity…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We will be in awe of his power…..<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And he will gather his disciples close to him and he will cast
out the unbelievers<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">His word will be “The Word” and we will all walk in his shadow.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He will wash the blood from the seats of power and <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He will welcome the money lenders, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For he will be nothing without them…</span><o:p></o:p></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-65480307457724714762013-09-05T05:30:00.003-07:002013-09-05T05:37:20.252-07:00Isolationism<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As the candidate representing Queensland...</span><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sorry No, I am the
candidate for all Australians!</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How do you plan to deal with our economic woes?</span><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">We will put our unemployed
to work at building<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>a wall.</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A wall?</span><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Yes, a great wall!
Made of blocks of coal! Around Queensland! Australia!</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A black block wall?</span><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Yes!! And the
unemployed will paint it white, and put the skeletons of fossilized dinosaurs atop
it.</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sort of white wash the problem?</span><br />
<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">And we will dress our
gladiators in brown and gold and they will hurl spears of sugar cane from the
top of the wall down at the approaching hoards who want to invade our land of plenty....
and soon nobody will want to come here...</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">True.</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-593696579996234172.post-44654456947835290332013-09-02T20:33:00.000-07:002013-09-05T18:46:40.079-07:00The Economy<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">What do you
see as the major problems with the economy?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Well, obviously the down turn in the
mining industry and the high Australian dollar have been major problems… We hoped
that housing construction would take up the slack….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">So are we too
dependent on mining and agricultural exports?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">We are very good at building houses….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">But who is
going to live in these houses?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">Hairdressers and baristas are doing
well….<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">What about
our manufacturing industry?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">I have great respect for our
manufacturing industry… Pental, Jimmy Possum, Spring Gully…<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Who?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;"><b>Well, Holden, Toyota, WD & HR Wills...</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">Ah ha...</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0