Contemplating Orange Crush

Hello Mr President.

Hi have we met before?

Oh yes, you liked my pussy….

Really? Was it orange like me?

I was in the Secret Service and you called me Agent Orange!

Wow, you must have had a killer pussy!

It sure blew your mind… 

….. So I hope you can remember something useful and answer my questions….

Don’t get aggressive now….

So tell me, do you believe China has Weapons Of Mass Destruction?

Oh yes, I do….

And you have hard evidence?

Yes, our intelligence people have reliable evidence!

So what are you going to do?

I have told the Chinese that we want our inspectors to access their labs.

And if they refuse?

We will punish them! I think we might invade…. Show them how great we are!

Really? Do you remember when Bush said Iraq was making viruses in their Labs?

Iraq, Iraq…. Is that a place?

Do you remember when we said if the communists took over Vietnam, all the SE Asian dominoes would fall?

That was long before my time… What happened?

We unleashed Agent Orange!

You really f**ked them over then….

Totally, yes and we are still paying for it!

Hmm, I’m the richest man in the world!  What are you doing after work?

Dealing With Covid 19 And Climate Change In Australia

Hello Minister…. Are you staying well?

Oh yes indeed. I have been maintaining social distancing!

And it has worked for you?

Oh and for the nation!

We seem to be doing well… So how long do you expect this to continue?

It depends on the science! We follow the advice of the scientific experts! That is the way we will avoid a total catastrophe.

So, it’s all about the science?

Yes, we accept the modelling and we formulate policy based on the scientific advice. And we wait for the scientists to find a vaccine or a cure…

And following the science is more important than following big business?

Yes in the short term, but in the longer term business will thank us! Everybody will thank us!

So will you change your policies to avert the catastrophic disaster that scientific modelling of climate change predicts? I mean, the vast majority of reputable climate scientists are predicting a cataclysm if we don’t do something soon!

Not everyone accepts that view! In the mean time we need an enquiry into the origins of the Covid 19 crisis!

But wasn’t it largely because politicians ignored the warnings of medical and scientific experts, both in China and then the rest of the world and did not take the appropriate actions quickly enough?

Australia has been quick to react and we have done well….. We have followed expert advice…

Yes, so shouldn’t we do more about climate change when it could destroy humanity and the planet as we know it?

Let us pray not!

Huh?